Literally, 'We Bought a Zoo'

Rosie approached her Dad who was in the kitchen at night. She whined about how again she had terrible bed time, 

"I couldn't sleep Daddy, their happyish is too loud." 

She drag her Dad's hand to follow her to the bedroom and showed him through the window. Their neighbors were having garden party and dancing under the sky. 

Poor Rosie and Dylan (her brother), both were grown up without the love from their Mom. Benjamin Mee, their Dad, was so busy with his adventurous works, no wonder they grew up messily. Dylan was always silent, when Dad only cared about Rosie, he expressed his feeling with his odd paintings. Too exceptional until the school was about to expel him for his brutal paintings of skulls and bloods that are not good to be seen and might give bad impacts to the school.

Long story short, Benjamin Mee decided to move out, so he could at least give a tiny of happiness for Rosie so she could have a better space for sleep. They bought a house with a zoo as a plus. 

Now I get it, the reason why the title is "We Bought a Zoo", because literally, they bought (a house plus) a zoo. 

The house was the only house with spacious yard, so Rosie doesn't bother to hear unnecessary 'loud' from neighbors. However, the former owner obliged the buyer to also buy the zoo (including to maintain his staff) that he has been looking after for so long and never wanted to shut it down. 

Seeing the smiles from Rosie when she pet the birds, Benjamin Mee could not say no. He approved whatever the requirement is. 

Nevertheless, the zoo was broken and needed to be renovated before re-open. Thus, for sure, he needed to spend much money. Recklessly, he didn't have enough money and was about to create a chaos as all the staff had already trusted him and if they knew he had no money,  they would feel him like a bullshit. The staff might think he made a fraud. 

Unexpectedly, when Mee almost gave up, while laying on the couch, wearing her wife's favorite grey hoodie, and putting his hand on the pocket, he found a letter. Her wife, generously, left him with a huge amount of money, because she knew him very well how adventurous he is but likely neglecting to plan financial matters, hence she might already predict that he would undergo this financial crisis in the future.

The zoo things, all had been almost resolved, yet his relationship with his son, were still bad. They were like cat and dog that always fight. Dylan preferred to do painting alone rather than in quarrel with his dad. While painting, Lily, the youngest staff in the zoo, around Dylan's age, frequently found him and shared her sandwich while watching him doing the painting. Lily looked amazed with his brutal painting when others felt annoyed. 

However, Dylan was slow to catch Lily's feeling. He, without feeling guilty, blabbered about his friends from his past school and how he missed them even though they never visited him since his moving. And he was excited to meet them and felt like he was going to leave Lily and chose his old friends than her who was currently accompanying him. Accordingly, Lily never appeared again in Dylan's painting spot. Dylan realized, how Lily's presence made him cheered, so without Lily, he felt empty. 

Knowing Dylan was dejected, his Dad approached him, "I thought you were friends with Lily", then they started to talk each other, Dylan was willing to open up to his Dad, then his Dad suggested him "20 seconds of bravery". He advised him, to be brave only for 20 seconds, to remove his insecurity, and just act, then he will see something surprising. His Dad said, it was what he did, when he firstly met their mother. 

On rainy day, the wet Dylan went to Lily's house, headed to her room, then he knocked her windows and called her from outside. He told her how he felt sorry and missed her out loud. And yes, what his Dad told him was correct, Lily accepted his apology and they made friends again. 

Besides Lily, his Dad was his first fan of his painting but he never told until he noticed that Dylan could contribute to the zoo with his skill. He asked Dylan to create the zoo logo. As expected, the logo was perfect. The re-opening of the zoo was a success. 

***

Here, I have several things to discuss regarding the movie. Firstly, I really like Rosie's line when she said "I couldn't sleep Daddy, their happyish is too loud." What she said was touching me, I understand the feeling very well, it is like when you were so hungry but no food, and could not help watching other people eating. It is better not to see. 

Real example nowadays is, when you use social media, and your life was stressful and you are craving of happiness. However, your friends' happyish posts just popped up while you are scrolling, meanwhile you could not afford the happiness at that time due to some reasons. I believe you feel happy too for your friends' happiness, yet I bet, there may be a tiny space in your heart that you are envy of their happiness. So rather than adding more stresses after comparing their life with yours, it is better not  to see. 

I have ever been in that place when I was having so many happy memories, but at that time, I never think what other people might feel about what I felt. I was too selfish, so now, I learned after being in another shoes. Oh, so this is the feeling when you are the viewer, you may feel sad and start overthinking about how your life is so miserable and it is disturbing your self-esteem. Thus, I tried to detach myself from social media. 

Secondly, being adventurous is great, but without planning, particularly financial planning, Benjamin Mee almost ruined his family. This is what is wise to be learned. Something cliché, but not easy to perform. As matter of fact, between us still prefer to buy something based on which brand, when it is pricy but still forcing own self to buy, then do not have money left for savings (except those who are already rich by privilege). So they live for what is present, and forget to plan for the future. 

The last, regarding "20 seconds of brave" is a good method especially for introvert person. This formulation is needed, one of the examples is when the introvert person is at work and is required to contact a key person. I understand how not easy it is to open a conversation but it is a must if we do not want to lose the job. So, this person needs 20 seconds of brave, and voila after it, it will just flow smoothly. 

That's all what are in my mind, if you have other opinion, just jump to my comments box below. I apologize if mistakes are found within my writing and thank you for visiting my blog :)

Disclaimer: all the pictures were taken from google.

What We Can Learn from Stargirl Disney Movie

From all Disney movies that I have watched, Stargirl left me puzzled about the ending. Disney movies in my mind, will always end with happily ever after or with contented feeling. Below, the storyline will be explained in nutshell but as a disclaimer, I did not intend to give the spoiler, but to show you how the ending raises questions and let us find our own answers.

Leo grew up without the shade of his Dad. Yet, it doesn't mean that Leo also buried his memories inside his Dad's grave. The porcupine-marked tie, his Dad's legacy, kept sparkling his remembrance about his Dad. How could he forget? when every time of his birthday, a gift of new tie with porcupine mark always knock his door. 

A girl called Stargirl, just like her name, was shining the mediocre junior high school. For years, no trophy existed in their shabby cupboard, and the losing in games was just normal. The students did participate but no fire to grab the victory. Until Stargirl, jumped to the middle of the field, started to play her ukulele and sang heartedly. Inspired everyone that they are also capable to win, just need to believe.  

The American Football game score was reversed, his school team started to beat the opposing's team. The first trophy finally existed in their school's cupboard after years only filled by spider web. Leo together with his marching band team, poured the field to celebrate their first proud winning.

Stargirl then joined school cheerleader, with her as the leader. Along with Leo's marching band team, they accompanied their school's American Football team and brought another trophies. 

This triumph also eased Leo to win Stargirl's heart, both became a lovebird. Leo had been in crush for long time to her, from the first sight he saw her from far when practicing with his marching band team in school field. 

Leo and Stargirl are just like yin and yang, the silent meets the loud. Leo spent most of his life without rebellion. Beaten by naughty kids or being bullied, he kept quiet. While Stargirl, followed the rule of action-reaction. When there is an action, she would mostly react what she thought is right. 

It seems that Stargirl also already had crush on him even before joining his school. She bravely approached his table in school canteen just to say hi. But, Leo was still shy and not sure if she likes him. He was afraid if what he felt was wrong about her so he kept his feeling for her for quiet long time. Until they made friends somehow and worked together for cheering their school team.

Everyone praised Stargirl for her brave and initiative. Like how Blu in Rio 2 spoke up to their herds not to keep silent but to fight out the logger. Her unique in style, thoughts, and  actions made her different with the rest of the students. However her difference was also what made her dig her own grave.

One of the players from the opposing team got injured. Without thinking, Stargirl approached him and accompanied him to get medicated. Everyone was speechless and could not digest well what they were watching. They turned out hated her for supporting the opposing team, for being a traitor. Leo most likely agree with everyone thinking, he wasn't in the same boat with her. Hence, he waited her all the night to get explanation from her. 

For the sake of humanity, she said. No one jumped to help and were only watching. So she felt terrible and came to help. Indeed, there was also medical team, but Stargirl ran faster than them. Having trust issue, every eyes then was always watching her movement. They now were asking whether her name of "Stargirl" is real or not. 

Then they found out was a fake. Susan is her real name. Leo requested her to be real, and started call her Susan. Moreover, he persuaded her to be normal as others. She rejected to be like Susan until the ice melted and she granted his request. Her look was changed as well, she became like how Susan should be, just an ordinary girl, with ordinary style as well. Susan is 180 degree different with Stargirl. 

She tried to explain to Leo that Susan is not her. She was not convenient for being Susan, while Stargirl made her alive. Without his approval, she returned back to her comfort zone, to be Stargirl. As everyone noticed her comeback, again she received rejection from the surroundings. But, she kept her confident. 

She appeared in their school ball when previously, she planned not to come. Again, with her unique style, she outshined everyone. Like a peacock in the middle of crowds of rats. 

Leo noticed her and she invited him to go to the stage. Stargirl supported him to sing when he never thought he could. Then finally, it was his first time breaking his fear. He did, amazed everyone with his nice voice.

No one knew, it was her last time with them. Leo tried to find every possible tracks she might visit, but no trace at all. Leo lost her. Somehow, the absence of her, the school also lost the spirit. Stargirl had touched everyone's heart by her fire and pure mind. As she never came back for a long time, her losing felt like a fairy tale. Nobody believed, she never existed, even the people began questioning whether she was real or just their illusion. 

Yet, what is real was, the Stargirl effect. Unconsciously, everyone started to wear colorful t-shirt mimicking her, the gloomy school now turned into bright school. Stargirl indeed had done something incredible to the school. 

Leo still tried to find her, but until the end of the movie, he was only able to find her working space room, where she put everyone's detail information, including Leo's activities since he was kid. Surprisingly, he found out, it was Stargirl, who kept sending him porcupine-marked tie for his birthday. When everyone thought she might not be real, he surely believes that she is present as she never stop sending him his favorite birthday gift though she was away.

So, this is the ending, how the viewers are also invited questioning her presence. I believe as a happy ending pursuer, you wish Leo finally found her, don't you? However, the movie didn't run that way. Instead, we are made to agree that to be different is fine, do not blame others for being not the same, as well as do not force someone to follow what he/she feels is not him/her. 

Our role as the society is to  open for all the uniqueness. Being different is not a sin, but to show how the life is in balance. World should be free for everyone. 

And one more thing to be reminded, any kindness will be left in longevity. As long as you think, it is good, do it and be confident. Every kindness will result in eternity, then will be passed down from generation to generation. The kindness will be preserved. 

At first, probably there will be disagreement on what you think is right, but somehow, the time will show that what you think is right, indeed right. Just how the 'Stargirl's spirit' stays in their school. 

Sometimes, kindness also can not be felt by everyone. At the time when your kindness can not be accepted, just let them do as they wish to think. That's might be the reason why Stargirl left everyone in school, as she felt being rejected and no more useful for everyone, so she decided to exit. I admit, there is no more happiest feeling unless the environment accepts you for being who you are. 

That's all about Stargirl Disney Movie and my opinion about what we can learn from the movie, hope you can get the lesson to be learned. Indeed, you are free to interpret, and I am welcome you to give your own opinion, in my below comment box provided. Thank you for jumping to my blog. I apologize if there are some mistakes within my writing. Have a nice day!

Disclaimer: all the pictures were taken from google, not from my personal documentation.

Let God and Psychologist Help You Be Healed

A random guy in instagram, direct messaged me, how he was inspired by my writing and helped him clarify his mind. I was touched and never think how my writing was able to move him. I admitted, some of my writings were about my contemplation about life, how I experienced it, what I could learn from it, and found the wisdom behind it that it was firstly intended solely for the sake of my self in order for me to feel relieved, to keep insane, after all the nightmares and heavy rains. 

Anyway, let me tell you a story about my life, that I hope if you are in the same situation with me, you can heal faster than me. 

Almost 2 years ago, a beautiful garden with full of colorful butterflies I dreamt didn't come true. In reverse, I was in the middle of the mud then brought to the sea, and a giant wave stroke me. It hit me hard into pieces. I felt numb and hard to breath. 

Seriously, literally having difficulties to breath for almost a year not because of COVID19 but due to my mental health problem. I never been in that nightmare situation everyday. I have talked to my close friends frequently but still I could not find the exit. At the time when my mental and physical health worsen and I could not resist it anymore, I sought help from Psychologist, then it worked. She helped me find the way with her different perspective.

It happened as for twenties years I hung my happiness on someone else. At the time when the person betrayed me, I felt like losing my one leg, made me disabled to live by the imbalance resulted. As well as, losing the motivation to live and started questioning why I live. I didn't have the purpose to live any more. 

But life kept going, I lived for year with this mental disorder. Never felt calm, always insecure, and having trust issue on someone else. The Psychologist helped me found the way. She taught me to accept what just happened, thought it was like a hell, she acknowledged my insecurity and normalized my choice by not forcing me to forgive when everybody forced me to do so, as she was on the same boat with me that his sin was not something that could be easily forgiven, and was okay to take times as she understood how I was not ready yet. 

However, she believed, by the time, I will be healed, and will no longer hate him. That will be the time for me to forgive him. In addition, she also normalized if the relationship might not be the same. It always happen as a result of a conflict, she said. So it is okay, if I might not talk as much as usual. Because, the memories stayed, and it was so hurting. 

As she expected, the time healed me. I felt no hurts any more and I could face him with no hate. But still, something had changed between us, I started to talk again, but could not be the same as in the past when I talked about everything. Now, I talk to him necessarily. I gained peace. I have my own life so does he. 

Anyway, during my journey to be healed. God also involved. In some ways, I was reminded about the concept of life. The purpose of life is simply to do worship to God, not to be rich or not to be acknowledged by the people. Moreover, before the creation of human, every soul has promised to God, and acknowledged Allah is the only one Almighty God. So when the soul was infiltrated in human body during the birth, basically the soul was just being deposited to other souls that we call parent. Even though we have the same blood, but in the end of the day, we are soul that bears our own deed, roughly, we do not have relation each other.

Thus, let everyone does what they wish. If in an occasion someone does harm to us, let them do, and as the one who was hurt, just keep in mind that life is only about you, not about others, so don't feel broken, it is okay to sad but don't too deep and just leave it to God, let Him do His role to remind His human. Our role as the soul in human body is to just focus in doing worship and to do good deeds until we meet God after the end of the day. 

If I have that mind earlier, I might not need to spend a year to be healed. Yet, I understand, that what I experienced are some of the scenes of my life that I will never forget and hope to be a lesson learned to be shared. 

When you feel your mental health disturbed, quickly seek for help from Psychologist and also involve God in every decision. By doing that, I hope you be healed faster and have a good life.